Bob Ross

18 Oct

Bob Ross

Thank you all who bought the Fairy Tale album! My deepest gratitude. For those coming late, you can catch the new album Fairy Tales for Homeless Faeries here.

But enough of fairies for now, then. It coming time for us to turn our full attention to The Atompunk Opera. I’ll begin discussion coming up here. In the meantime let us watch a cultural icon.

For non Americans, or American outside this particular generational scope, Bob Ross is like… this… he’s AWESOME and utterly adored by not only me, but a lot of other who grew up watching him.

Basically, there was your public funded channel, PBS. On it would be this little painting show. This guy, Bob Ross, with a total post hippy vibe would show you how to paint by painting a painting in a half hour and talking to you about it in this incredibly soothing voice.

See, you might stumble across it and give it a minute or two just because of the total cheese factor, but the thing is, the more you watched or kept running across him, the longer and longer you’d watch. All your irony would fade away. All your troubles. You would just watch this guy paint a happy little scene, talking you down all the way through it.

He’d be painting some scene and you’re like:”Dammmmn Bob, that is seriousy sweet, dude.”

And Bob would be like “Okay then, let’s just put a few little happy trees in the foreground here…”

and you’d be like “BOB! NO! NO man, it’s perfect dude! I would be amazed if i could paint a cliff like that!” Casue Bob could literally wave his brush around for a few moment, a couple lines is all, and BOOM there’d be like, this totally gorgeous piece of nature. It’s not that it’s Monet or anything, but in front of your eyes he just makes this really beautiful shit like it’s NOTHING. And he’s supposedly teaching you, but you KNOW if you picked up a brush you would NEEEEEEver be able to make shit like that with that much ease.

So you’d be like “Bob! No! It’s perfect!”

But then he’d paint those happy little trees and you’d be just be like “oooooooooooooooooh, dude. You’re right. That IS so cool.”

Or he do this thing on the canvas and you’d be like, “Wtf is that? Dude, dude that doesn’t even look like…”

and then he’d take his brush and tap lightly and smooth it out and suddenly this bunch of paint would literally beCOME a mountain, or a lake or a forest like effin’ MAGIC.

And watching him do his little painting thing is one of the most mellowing, relaxing, zen things you would do in your entire day. If you run across Bob Ross on the net, you’ll notice quickly he is loved and adored. (he’s dead)

He’s like, the cure for irony and cynicism. You will just get sucked in and leave the rest of the cold world outside.

One last note: Did you know Bob Ross was a Master Sergeant in the Air Force?

“I was the guy who makes you scrub the latrine, the guy who makes you make your bed, the guy who screams at you for being late to work. The job requires you to be a mean, tough person. And I was fed up with it.”

When Ross retired from the Air Force, he allegedly vowed never to scream again.

So here is a bunch of Bob Ross clips. (I would just post a single show if could  but i can’t find any.) Mr. Ross, to you my beautiful, happy compadre.

1 Comment

Posted by on October 18, 2013 in Uncategorized


One response to “Bob Ross

  1. Mark

    October 18, 2013 at 11:11 pm

    As someone who grew up with Bob Ross in the US, I was amazed to see a graffiti (stencil) of his distinctive head and shoulders in Reykjavík a few years ago. Apparently, his influence is trans-Atlantic…


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